Stuff Magazine

Stuff Magazine

"Best Hangover Killer"

Being a cheap-ass booze whore is in again. (Mother will be so pleased.) The liquored-up folks at Gray Kangaroo were sick of slugging bottle after bottle of bottom-shelf gin and vodka that went down like fire-breathing crabs, so they’ve decided to do something about it. Quit drinking? Oh, no, let’s not get hysterical here. To protect their brains from bargain bleach, they created the Personal [Liquor] Filter ($30), which strips crappy booze of all its crappy impurities.

Don’t expect it to turn Georgi into Ketel One, but your esophagus won’t feel like you just swallowed Lava Man’s load either. The gizmo doesn’t effect the alcohol content at all, so your liver will still get to absorb all of those noxious toxins that promise to deliver you to an early grave. Why should the filter have all the fun?

Clinton Chronicle, NYC

Clinton Chronicle, NYC

"Spoons Says: "The Greatest Scientific Breakthrough Since Penicillin!"

by Spoons, Saloon Columnist

Imagine a device that let you put Hershey's chocolate in one end and dispensed fine Swiss Truffles from the other end. Or, more to the point, let you put dingy old pennies in one end and out came gold bars from the other. Well that in a nutshell is what you get when you use the astonishing Gray Kangaroo Personal Liquor filter. You put lousy cheap booze in one end, and out comes premium quality liquor at a fraction of the cost. That's the promise they make and after a month of experimentation Spoons assures you that it works.

The Gray Kangaroo has been described as a Brita for Booze. Sort of, but it is way more powerful than a water filter. The Gray Kangaroo gives the consumer the ability to turn a cheap $7 bottle of vodka into a product as clean and smooth as any top shelf $30 brand like Skyy, Van Gogh or Grey Goose. Just run the cheap stuff through the filter four or five times (the cheaper the stuff the more it benefits from repeated passes) and you are using the same filtering technology that the expensive brands use, but at a fraction of the cost. The device saves you a fortune because each one can filter 50 liters of liquor - including multiple passes - and it sells for under $30. Refill filters cost only about $11.

This is a personal money machine, allowing anyone to enjoy top-shelf quality beverages for bottom dollar. We here at Spoons Central experimented with a brand of vodka so cheap that it actually had particulate matter floating in it. It smelled like fuel and a sip straight up made us gag. Perfect to put these Gray Kangaroo people to the test. One pass through the filter and the vodka was noticeably cleaner and less harsh. By the second pass it was getting smoother. After four passes, all the stink was eliminated. A fifth pass, and what we had made the smoothest Apple Martini we have ever tasted. And the Bloody Marys were superb. This device is pure genius. We will never buy top brands of vodka again.

The Gray Kangaroo works nicely with all liquors including whiskey, rum, gin tequila, but all signs point to vodka faring the best. If you filter the other booze too much you risk driving out their flavor. But a pass or two does improve any cheap hooch. And the makers offer this guarantee: "If you don't notice a substantial improvement in the quality of your liquor after you filter it, send your Gray Kangaroo back to us within 30 days and we'll give you your money back with a handwritten letter of apology!"

If you have Internet access, Spoons ardently suggests that you look at their exquisitely ribald website: graykangaroo.com. There you will find all the info you could possibly want as well as photos, wallpaper, press reports and uproarious, impromptu videos of people taking "before and after filtering" taste tests.